babe envy

today i am having major
BABE ENVY.
i want one
however
that is a big however
i don't know if i want
to go through the birthing process..
i mean maybe the
growing.
moving.
bubbling.
feeling.
just minus the.
vomiting.
constant urination.
pain.
nervousness.
contractions.
did i mention
PAIN.

Considering i have had
kidney stones.
nerve pain.
cramps( that would make you slap your MAMA)
that make you miss work,
crawl everywhere
crying buckets o tears
i would like to skip the
PAIN.
obviously i am not a fan of
pain.
more like we are mortal enemies

i know that i have posted before
the difficulty i am going to have
when and if i find someone to
share my life with
to have children.

i believe the only way to
get what i want
and i am not talking about
lil spit balls either
been there did that
thanks rents'
i am talking about a 2-5 yr old
girl who needs a home.
someone to love them unconditionally
smile when she does something adorable
be there for her at all times
watch her grow up to be a beautiful human being
support and given knowledge too
mold and provide boundaries
nurture and trust her to make good decisions
teach and provide LOVE
simple and plenty of
LOVE.

this will happen sooner than later
and if i meet someone along the way
to share my life with than terrific
but i am a package and you must
love the entire package.