Recently I divulged some personal information that was plaguing me for sometime (over 20 years) and after I said what I had to say I woke up the next morning with a pep in my step. I don't know if my pep is due to the opening up and telling something that horrible or the fact that I am no longer the only one with that burden. My father the one I spoke with reacted in a way i didn't expect he would. That was the most important reaction he could have done. I didn't tell him to make him feel bad or get individuals in trouble but having the burden of keeping a secret since childhood for fear of something happening to your immediate family is horrible for child.
In the class I have been taking for the last few weeks it has given me my voice back; not that it ever left. But the feeling that I didn't do anything wrong. Many will ask why no therapy or counseling and really I didn't think I needed it at the time however after dealing with others I realize that the best thing I can do for myself is get counseling which I have decided to do.
I am not concerned with the getting even or putting the "family members/individuals" in jail for they will make their own bed and lay in it. Besides nothing I could have done they haven't done worse to themselves.
Maybe my new leaf on life is that all the things that I am and have done are in spit of the what happened.
No comments:
Post a Comment